Always be slow to raise your hand...

...but swift to bring it down.

My philosophy

Or, what’s good for the bottom is good for the soul....

Many a young lady - despite modern day notions - relishes firm handling and strict discipline.  The anticipation and apprehension at the imminent prospect of going over a gentleman’s knee causes the most self-possessed of ladies hearts to flutter.  Actually being over a gentleman’s knee may seem an awful, most painful and most embarrassing predicament - but notably it induces that state called a “squidgy feeling”.  And the contrition felt after receiving such treatment is delightfully comforting and calming.

Of course, a vital ingredient is to go over the right gentleman’s knee.  Each lady must choose for herself, but in my philosophy it should be someone who is courteous, considerate and kindly, who appreciates more what it going on in the lady’s mind and not just what is going on with her bottom, who has sufficient expertise with his hands and his implements to create just the right effect, who can select between a sharp note of command and a soft whisper of encouragement as circumstances demand, with the wit, charm and humour to create the atmosphere in which unusual things seem natural, and the personal integrity in which a lady may place her trust completely.

Lord F is, of course, too modest to consider this a description of himself, but he invites you to investigate further.... Interested ladies may apply to Lord Fawcett at the address shown on the Way Out.